Every Room Is a Classroom

The young professional who made the strongest impression in a room full of senior executives was the one who didn't know anyone's title. More on her in a moment.

How many times have you told yourself you need to meet more people? That your circle of influence needs strengthening? Your career requires you to build relationships, and you must be intentional about it.

Networking requires planning: an approach that is strategic and measurable, one you learn from every time you introduce yourself to a new group or reconnect with an old one. Viewed through an opportunity lens, networking becomes a professional development boot camp.

It forces you to test your ideas, sharpen how you communicate and strengthen your presence. The more you put it off, the more disconnected you become from the people and opportunities that could move your career forward.

Why Networking Feels Hard

For many people, networking feels like a required class they had no interest in taking. But in business and in life, success is often earned by learning to do the things you don't enjoy doing.

You don't need to be naturally outspoken. You do need to be prepared to deliver value when it's your turn to speak. Networking is active. It's not about you. It's about how well you integrate your voice and perspective into the conversation, and how closely you listen to what matters to the people around you.

Talk to the Person, Not the Title

The best networking happens when you aren't distracted by the title or influence of the person in front of you. Most people feel unsafe in rooms full of people who hold more power than they do, so they hold back.

I remember a discussion at a conference that included several senior executives. A younger professional in the group didn't know anyone's title. She was funny, told great stories and was highly articulate. When she asked for business cards, she realized one of the people in the group was the CEO of a Fortune 100 company. She was shocked and began apologizing for being so opinionated. There was no need. She had made the strongest impression in the room precisely because she was being herself.

When we are ourselves, we express our points of view most naturally and make our best first impression. Rank should inform which topics you raise, not who you are.

Seven Lessons From the Networking Boot Camp

1. Learn from your peers. Treat every gathering, in person or virtual, like a focus group. Notice what works for others and what doesn't, and apply it.
2. Always be ready. Networking can't be forced, but you must be quick on your feet and prepared to engage.
3. Take notes. Retention comes from good notes. Capture what you learned about others and about how you showed up.
4. Ask unexpected questions. Years ago I spoke at a conference right after a well-known economist who presented his outlook on economic recovery. During the break, we found ourselves in the green room together, and I asked him how we could all be so optimistic about recovery when so many people had never been taught how to survive. That one unexpected question started a lasting relationship.
5. Test your personal brand. Every conversation is a chance to see whether your identity lands. Be memorable without being self-promotional.
6. Continue the conversation. If the exchange was worthwhile, take the lead in following up. You become the catalyst for opportunity.
7. Hold yourself accountable. Follow up, follow up, follow up. Act like a project manager: define the next steps, who owns them and what outcome you want.

What People Should Remember About You

When you walk away from a conversation, the people you met should be able to answer four questions about you:

• What is your enduring idea?
• What differentiates you from others?
• What experience do you leave behind?
• Whom do you serve?

If they can't, you have your homework. Refine how you describe your personal brand story until those answers come through naturally.

What No Tool Can Do for You

The North American CEO of a luxury automaker, who also teaches MBA students, told me what he says on the first day of class: "I'm here so that you can learn from me, from my experiences, but also, and for me more importantly, so I can learn from you." His students look at him as if they don't understand. But when you sit with someone who is 23, 24 or 25, he said, they have a completely different perspective on life. AI can summarize a person's background before you meet. It can't give you that. The judgment, curiosity and presence you develop in real conversations are the skills that compound.

Walk Into the Next Room Ready

Before your next event or virtual gathering, set a learning goal and prepare one unexpected question you genuinely want answered. While you are there, write down three observations about how others engage. Then follow up with two people within 48 hours.

Networking should ultimately be rewarding. The more you do it with a positive outlook, the more you learn, and when you're always learning, you're always growing. Once you've mastered it, teach someone else what you know.

Want to explore these ideas further? Learn more about my work on leadership, identity and conviction at www.theglennllopis.com.